Well today was one of those days I was stopped in my tracks and overcome with gratefulness! Turner rushed to my side while we were playing outside and asked why I was crying...yes I'm certain he thinks his mom is CRAZY!!!! And it got me thinking....what has God taught me over the past 4 years thru our adoption journey....the list could go on and on....but here are some of the highlights
The 1st lesson(s) God taught me with sweet Turner was patience, acceptance, and grace. We had almost 2 years of fertility treatment before we began our adoption journey...while we didn't wait very long for Turner, it seemed like FOREVER! God prepared my heart and gave me patience exactly when I needed it. The 1st year after he was born was a rocky start with his birth mother...thru all the ups and downs, time and time again God nudged me and did wonders in my heart about acceptance & grace and boy am I glad he did. If I would not have been obedient to his "nudging" I would have missed out on so many blessings! Our relationship with his birthmomma and his siblings is more than I could have ever imagined or dreamed of!
Romans 8:28 "All things are working together for good in my life because I love God and I am called according to His purpose."mothers heart, forgiveness, and unconditional love. My earthly body/heart/soul wanted to be bitter, angry, and full of hate towards "M" but my Heavenly Father would not allow it...still to this day I stand in awe of how God took my heart ache and turned it into one of the most incredible experiences I have ever had. It was and still is so surreal and hard to describe the overwhelming sense of peace I felt leading up to and the days following returning Braxton to his mothers arms. I wouldn't change a single thing even if I could. I am so blessed by "M" and her sweet little boy and honored to call her my friend! When we are together my heart overflows with thankfulness. Isaiah 40:31 Every day as I wait upon the Lord, he renews my strength. I rise up as the eagles, I will run and not get weary. I will walk and not faint."
FAITHFULNESS. He knew my hearts desire to be a mother. Hebrews 13:5-5 sums it up:" I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. I will not, I will not. I will not leave you helpless or forsake you nor let you down. Assuredly not. So take comfort and are encouraged confidently and boldly say. The Lord is my helper, I will not fear or dread or be terrified." Mark 9:23 "Jesus said, if I can believe, all things are possible, so I believe." God knew all along the outcome of our journey and I am forever grateful for EVERY SINGLE step thus far!
I'm certain he's not finished! There are many more lessons ahead!
"The Holy Spirit is in me to reveal the hidden things that I cannot see with my natural eyes. I believe that God gives me the spirit of wisdom and revelation through a growing knowledge of him so that the eyes of my understanding are enlightened, that I may know what is the hope of His calling and the riches of His glory and inheritance is in His saints and what is His greatness to us who believe"
Feeling blessed beyond words tonight!!